OFF TO SEE THE WHIZZER
Posted by
Bill Kent
on Sep 5, 2007
- This post is archived and may no longer be relevant
Fervid fans of Norbert’s cummulusly cloudscaped on-line diaries
are horrified of an emergent Guitar Daft practice reminiscent of the
the discredited American economic "trickle down" theory.
What, then, are we to make of whizzery? Is it, as some allege, a
malevolent metaphor for musical micturition, a veritable pissing
contest for the tumescently twanged? Or is it a snarky plagiarism of
Captain Beefheart’s blues-infected Lo Yo Yo Stuff? The latter seems
insipidly likely, as investigators attached to Her Magesty’s Ministry
of Ineffectual Property, exploiting peep holes in new surveillance laws
intended to combat international errorism, have covertly recorded our
Norbert inside the recently repaired DGM shower, warbling the the
sneaky, slashing, urgently ominous guitar riff from the good Captain’s
immortal "I"m Gonna Booglarize Ya, Baby."
This has aroused no small amount of
speculation, if not peculation, regarding the motives of the floor
boarding, angst-hoarding guitarist, whose latest musical efflorescence,
Brother Can You Spare a Dime: Merchscrapes (solo soundscrapes
performed at merchandise tables at Alabama 3 concerts), has been tapped
for the soundtrack of a forthcoming Adam Curtis BBC documentary The
Yawn: How A Few Obscure Aging Anoraks Have Made Anglo-American Culture
So Intensely Peculiar.
That same trenchant recording
has inspired rival BBC documentarian Michael Wood to embark on a four
part series "In Search of Norbert Fragg" retracing the less-than-happy
gigster's numerous travels, travails, unacceptable hotels, wonderings
and ponderings, sittings and spittings. Alas, representatives for
the dribbling, prune popping guitarist informed Wood that he is no
longer the youthful, hair-suited, not-yet-photo-averse, mobile
intelligent ‘80s New Wave Fragger-tonic-to-dominant rebel of by-gone
days. What would have been a probing examination of a musician’s quest
for meaning in a world of photographic depredation, relentless tedium
and, given Norbert's above-a-butcher shop office locale, endless beef,
has been "hiatused" until the reactivation of Thing Dismal or the
reappearance of Halley’s Comet, whichever comes first.
