Robert Fripp's Diary

Thursday 24 May 2007

UK Spain Argentina Air Iberia

16.04 UK, 17.04 Spain, 14.04 Argentina.

Air Iberia 6845, 36046’ above the Atlantic, 3077 miles to Buenos Aires, 3430 miles from Madrid, 6 hours 11 minutes to destination.

Rising at 04.00, taxi call at 05.00, the M4 closed so we took the A4 to Heathrow Terminal Two. Speedy check-in but the longest queue to security I have seen at any airport, and this at 05.30. That’s the queue to the security queue, not security itself.

Air Iberia has improved since, in response to a question asked by Tony Bacon in 1991 at the EG Music Group offices, Blenheim House, Kings Road, Chelsea, during the last series of interviews conducted for EG:

TB:      What advice would you give a young musician?
RF:      Never fly Air Iberia.
TB:      No, seriously.
RF:      Seriously. Never ever fly Air Iberia.

Air Iberia was the airline where a stewardess was seen sitting on a jump seat, smoking, under the no smoking sign. Iberia changed ownership just over a year ago, and the effects are tangible.

I have travelled too far & too often on unhappy flights, with boobies rampant, twitching, sniffing & picking, to spend 14 hours in the air in a packed cattle class seat to any destination I can presently conceive; 21 years with Pan Am, 15 years with United, a loyal frequent flier on both (and many other lines flown as well).

Why is my chosen carrier today Air Iberia? Premium Economy on United from London > Buenos Aires was $2,500, Business Plus on Iberia $2,300. United would have me on 2 long-haul flights (routing I have travelled regularly): London > Washington, Washington > Buenos Aires. Problem is that passengers transiting in the US don’t transit in the US. They have the same procedures as if staying in the country: immigration, customs & then transit. If you arrive in the immigration hall at the queue-end of a full flight from Korea being processed, this can take 2 hours from entering immigration to leaving customs, before re-checking through security & going to your gate. That is, you will miss your connection (this is typed from experience). So, United > Buenos Aires is 2-3 hours check-in at Heathrow, 9 hours onboard, 2-3 hours changeover, 11 hours to BsAs EZE, arriving on the following day; and a night flying is a night’s sleep lost.

Air Iberia guaranteed Business Plus seat $2,300: 2 hours check in at London, 2.5 hours onboard to Madrid, transit with security re-check at Madrid, 12.5 hours onboard to BsAs. Here’s the joy: Business Plus is more like first class than standard business class, and today’s cabin has few passengers, perhaps only one quarter full, so I have 2 business seats – window + aisle. And much better equipment, much better food & in-flight facilities, fixed seats with internal slide-recline so the passenger in front doesn’t stick their seat in your face. Multiple movie choices, interactive screen, in-seat power connectors for computers for US plugs, so no pratting about with speciality connectors.

The Air Iberia culture continues to a degree. AI current NPU walk-on music has a 15-20 minute tape set to continuous-replay, beginning with an Iberian balladeer simpering Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes, followed by Satie’s Gymnopedie No.1 set to drum machine, then a Julie London – Barney Kessel Cry Me A River sound-alike - cycling on both flights! And when we took off from Madrid no-one turned it off! 90 minutes of this was close to Sonic Crime.

But, simpering balladeers aside, I am a happy boy.

17.45…